December 29th, 2011

So unfair. Last cycle when DH was around I had a really short follicular phase for some reason, and this cycle, when he is away I ovulate on CD14. Go figure. Maybe I should be upset about DH being away for Christmas more often. lol Or if it's a sign of things to come, i.e. a slightly longer and more securely in the normal range for follicular phases, then I will be happy. We shall see...

Onto cycle 24 & the big AC decision

Well today is CD1 for me. For the first time ever I was 2 days over my luteal phase and I went out and bought a hpt yesterday, was impatient and tested right away (not with fmu) and I thought I could see something and got all excited about testing this morning. I'd even had a proper night sweat the night before. Then just after 7pm last night I got some fairly mild but very localised cramps (normally my AF cramps are just a dull, heavy feeling ache). And then AF turned up. I really shouldn't have let myself get excited because now I'm really down in the dumps and very teary. DH isn't home now until February so that's TTC out the window for a little while. We've now decided that that's enough trying to conceive naturally as with DHs job the odds really aren't on our side even if everything is working just fine in both of us. But we don't even know that. Also I turn 37 in March and things just aren't going to be getting any easier for us now. So I'll be getting off my back side and sorting out medical insurance for us out here in S America and organising initial tests for myself and for DH once he's home again. And we'll go from there.

Cycle #19 - CD8

Well the witch got me and I'm now onto cycle 19 of ttc#1. However this and the next 3 cycles are duds for me from the get go as my gorgeous husband won't be back home until sometime in November. So I'm on CD8 and waiting to ovulate. I'm just going to try to do a good job with my temping for these 4 cycles so I know what's what and hopefully everything will be within normal ranges etc. I've had a couple of really low temps this time, below 36 degrees, but I don't really know if that's normal for me or not. We'll see I guess.

13dpo

So today has been this weird spotting on and off all day and sometimes with a fair bit of cm too. But no AF. My normal LP is 13 to 14 days though so really she wasn't meant to show today and if she's going to make an appearance, it's going to be tomorrow or Saturday. Anyway, tomorrow I'm going to use the last cb digi test in the house. Hopefully AF won't show before then... or at all for that matter. I can but hope. I don't want to have to wait until the end of October to be able to try again!

12dpo

So yesterday was 12dpo. I did another IC HPT and nothing. After the 10 minutes I could make out the faintest of pink lines but that doesn't count. And I decided that since I now only have one cb digi test left that I was going to use that at 14dpo if AF hasn't shown herself by then. And just as I was getting ready to go to bed, I went for a pee and had the faintest of pink/ brown wipes. Not normal for me because if and when I spot, it's obvious and not subtle at all. But this has happened to be before on one cycle and AF did show up in the end. However, that was a cycle when DH was around so I suppose it is possible that we did manage to conceive, implant, still test negative and then have the bean fall of and AF show up, be none the wiser and just think that it was a very weird start to AF. Anyway, maybe that's just hopeful thinking.

11dpo

Ok, I think I've been staring at this thing too long. Have I gone cross eyed or can you see something really faint??? This image has been resized. Click this bar to view the full image. The original image is sized 960x197. Edit: After calming down from this morning, I'm now thinking that it's most likely an evap line or just the test area showing up. Trying to be realistic. On the other hand, it could be the start of something pink showing up and I've just caught it really early. Not realistic but it would be very exciting! I sent the photo to my husband and he can see something there too. Bless him we were both on Skype earlier telling each other not to get excited but then he blurted out that he is very excited. Oh I just love him so much!

10dpo

Well, still nothing one way or the other. Still a bfn. I don't feel pregnant and I don't have any af symptoms either. I'm pretty sure she's on her way though. This image has been resized. Click this bar to view the full image. The original image is sized 960x196.

9dpo

Now that I've said I would love to get the faintest of bfp's even if it was just a chemical because it would be nice to know we could even get that far, I felt compelled to test again this morning. Just in case it was going to be the only day that I got the faintest of bfps, but therefore satisfied that need to know we could get that far. Anyway, still negative, but it's still early. Oh and my boobs are a bit swollen and a little tender today but that's probably just because af is getting ready to make an appearance. This image has been resized. Click this bar to view the full image. The original image is sized 960x219.

8dpo

8dpo Ok, I caved! lol Did a 10mIu test and nothing. Could have sworn I could see the faintest of lines but I inverted the colours and you can clearly see that my eyes were making things up. This image has been resized. Click this bar to view the full image. The original image is sized 960x161. But I still feel nothing. No symptoms at all and nothing that feels like it could be af either. But then again, she's not due for another 4 days. So I'm going to resist the urge to poas tomorrow and do another one on 10dpo. Fingers crossed but I'm starting to feel a little more settled in the whatever wagon. I'm already thinking about when DH is next home and going for the preliminary tests to get IUI underway. It would be so wonderful to be able to be in with a chance every cycle and not one in 3 or 4.

6dpo

I am dying to do a test!!!!! I know it's ridiculously early and so I won't but the urge is there. Arrrrgh! I hate waiting. lol I've started symptom spotting as well which I know I also shouldn't do. And I guess that's why I've decided to write this down, so hopefully I can stop thinking about it. I've had a couple of very mild cramps today. Ok, they're not even that, more like twinges. But that could just be trapped wind. And I've been sooooo lethargic and just blah today it's unbelieveable. Very unlike me. But that could just be down to missing my husband. Right, I think a kick up the backside is needed so that I get on and do something productive with my day!

August 24th, 2011

So it's over a year since I last wrote anything. This try to conceive malarky isn't as easy as it seems. I guess it doesn't help that my gorgeous husband works abroad for 9 weeks at a time and is only home for 3 weeks inbetween which means that even when we are together, we still sometimes miss my fertile window. I really should start tracking the number of cycles that we're actually in with a chance. Maybe this will be a way of doing just that. Anyway, my husband left to go back to work this past Saturday and I either ovulated on the Friday or the Saturday (clever me managed to forget to take my temperature on the Saturday!). We dtd on Wednesday night and Saturday morning so hopefully we timed things well and are in with a chance this time. He's now not home again until sometime in late October / early November. So at the moment I'm counting Friday as my ovulation day, more than anything so that when I get my period, I won't get caught out by a day. lol So that makes me 5 (or 4) DPO. I think I'll do my first test at 11 (or 10) DPO. We'll see if I can hold out for that long as I love to POAS! So other than all that, I've been working on the Couch to 5K running programme. I'm into week 3 now and I just finished the second run. That was 25 minutes of exercise, a total of 9 minutes of running and I covered 2.7km. At this rate, I'll be doing much more than 5km by the end of week 9. But I'm happy with that. It was hard work today as I picked up the pace but I'm feeling really goooood now!